Essentially Samantha

  So today I decided to send the most important email of my life. I emailed the Prime Minister, Andy Burnham. I mentioned that God is reasonable and wants to listen to us and react accordingly. I asked Andy to listen to disability action groups. We face utterly vile discrimination. Years of Tory propaganda demonising the disabled as benefit scroungers. It needs to stop. Cuts to benefits need to stop. We go through degrading and dehumanising procedures and reviews just to get a minimal financial benefit, which in itself is not enough to live off. We live in fear every day that this financial support will be withdrawn. Fraud is so rare, and it's amazing how everyone seems to know people faking illness for benefits. Amazing still that these people are never reported. In other news...I passed with a distinction a course that I found difficult and rewarding. From quantum physics to mysticism. Mental health users need to keep the brain from fogging over. It also helps distract from the w...

  Well, well well. So it turns out that for the first time in 15 years, I am now mentally stable. My new Psychiatrist is meeting with my old Psychiatrist tomorrow and is going to brag about how she finally got me stable after only meeting with her 2-3 times!  I can just see my old pdoc's face. He tried so hard with me, but nothing worked. We managed to work out that it is a combination of Lithium, Aripiprazole, Clopixol and a measly HRT patch that finally stopped the auditory and visual hallucinations. My mood has balanced right out as well. It's nothing short of miraculous. I'm so grateful to my old pdoc, as he never gave up on me, but my new pdoc is a Godsend. I think being a woman, she was willing to try new medications and routines with me. It paid off as I now don't react to situations overemotionally. I don't burst into tears at any kind of sadness. My medication allows me to step back and rationalise what's going on and allows me the time to react sensibl...

For The past week I've been in hospital with the most horrendous pain in my upper stomach. I went in to a +e on Tuesday I had the most vile, hideous pain. The hospital was so busy they had to give me Oramorph in the corridor. It took 45 mins for it to work and it tastes vile. My inflammation markers were so high doctors knew something was going on but not nesscarily what was going on. Of course I had to declare my bipolar. Which led one ignorant prescriber to issue me with a sedative throughout the day. Can't have the bipolar going manic now can we? I assured the nurses who looked concerned every time I refused it that bipolar doesn't work like this. I'm gutted that even in my middle age doctors think it ok to sedate mental health patients all day.